"Tell a friend where you'll be and when you expect to be home, and meet for coffee in a public place," suggests Dr. "Four out of five men you go out with will disappear," says Dr. Don't take it personally, and instead try to remember that if you're meeting a lot of people, the number of bad apples will go up — but so will the odds that you'll meet a few good apples too. Kirschner recommends, to start by dating several guys at the same time.
Dating after divorce can be a minefield for the midlife woman.
Perhaps even thornier than pondering what to wear on a date, where to go, who pays — not to mention how you even find people to date in this brave new world of Internet match-ups — is getting over your reluctance to take a stab at it. "A divorced woman may feel very vulnerable at this stage, in part because she used to have a spouse to 'protect' her and now she has to go out into the world on her own," says Diana Kirschner, Ph D, author of .
That said, don't let a fear of your children being upset or disapproving stop you from getting out there if you feel ready to.
"Too many women hide behind their kids as an excuse not to date," says Gadoua.
Anyone who says otherwise is probably exaggerating or lying. Your social skills might need some fine-tuning after being married for so long, this is a good opportunity to get that practice.