In other words, there's often a lot for them to "unlearn" in recovery.
In Twelve Step programs, and especially in Steps Four through Ten, PIRs learn how to develop healthy relationship skills.
This category also gets the PIR thinking about how they were inconsiderate with their partner, how they might have been jealous or suspicious, or how they might have cheated on their partner.
Paul told me that, for him, the easiest part was to remember and list all the people he had harmed.
In these Steps, PIRs practice reaching out to other people and face their fear of rejection.