But sometimes you just need someone to remind you that you're not alone, and maybe even tell you what to do. These days, you can learn so much just from listening to a podcast, whether you want to hear stories about serial killers and murder or dish about D-list celebrity gossip.
And yes, you can even discover things about your own relationship just by listening to strangers talk about theirs.
Once, I saw a Facebook profile of someone he ended up sleeping with, and she was absolutely stunning.
That was hard for me because I couldn’t help but compare myself to how I perceived her online (most of which was just illusions filled in by my very own brain, of course). Just because he was the cause of my hurt, it didn’t mean I couldn’t wait to run into his arms and have him comfort me. In monogamous relationships in the past, I was incredibly jealous all the time.
But society told me I had to be with one person at a time, with the goal of choosing one person forever. After a really great, long-term, successfully monogamous relationship ended, I was suddenly single in my late twenties and enjoying the freedom and the variety. Adam was fun and our chemistry was fantastic and rare, and though we kept it strictly physical, with those boundaries clearly defined throughout, spending time together was becoming the highlight.
I would often fall into a cycle of trying to make that work but eventually letting temptation get the best of me, and failing both parties of the relationship; especially my partner. Eventually, the inevitable conversation came up naturally about what we were, and what we could be.
I get that it can be hard for a lot of people to understand.